settled to be second

The challenge in life is not found in struggling to be first...it's having the right mentality to settle for second.

I have been a believer and follower of the Lord Jesus Christ for 16 years. I have studied under the leadership of my Dad, my Pastor and other dedicated Pastor-Teacher. In those 16 years, I tried to be the best Christian that God would someday look upon with favor. I took control of my own Christian life and steered it the way I thought would be best for me and God. I volunteered to be part of our Church's praise and worship team and even mustered the guts to take a leadership position. I took interest in teaching God's word and even surrendered my life for future mission endeavors. I was doing everything according to plan...yet something was definitely wrong.

I immersed myself to deeper doctrinal concepts so that I won't venture into doubt and dismay. I even went on a mission trip to the most remote place i know here in the Philippines. I preached God's word there and even left an impact...but when I came back...nothing felt right.

Then it hit me...God was not in it. When I prayed to God about something, it was more of informing Him rather than asking for leading. I was taking the lead and not letting God work through me. I was enjoying the moment, but not gaining anything from it. I was living like a boss in a life that was graciously granted to me by God Himself. My perspective in life was messed up...I was struggling to be first.

I needed a total mentality makeover. As Max Lucado's book did say, it's not about me...it's all about God! I was living independently from God. I was king of my life...making poor decisions but was never ready for the consequence. It needed a lot of heart aches before I realized the stupid situation I was getting myself into.

Now...I learned to let go and let God. I'm not saying I don't do anything...I still do what I can, but now, I leave the results to God with a mentality that whatever God decides, it's always for the best! So let me encourage you...live a life that is second to God. It's worth it!

Hi...I'm TJ Ermitaño...and I am second.